Compassionate support and expert guidance for your family
through the sacred journey of aging and end of life.

Each of us must become impassioned, finding meaning and self-fulfillment in our own life's journey.

Meet Adrian Allotey

Certified Reiki Practitioner & Certified End of Life Doula to Certified End of Life Doula, Certified Reiki Practitioner and Elder Companion



End of Life Code of Ethics

As a certified End of Life Doula trained by the Suzanne B. O’Brien’s Doulagivers, we promise to practice our profession with integrity, honesty, and truthfulness and to safely care for our patients and their loved ones. This includes but is not limited to no prejudice or judgment, respecting others' opinions, working to the best of our ability, and meeting our patients and their families “where they are” in their process. We will always put the patient's best interest first in all situations.

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Latest News

Doulas Are Becoming Part Of The End-Of-Life Equation

Jan 07, 2020

Doulas Are Becoming Part Of The End-Of-Life Equation

According to The New England Journal of Medicine, more people are choosing to die at home rather than in a hospital. It's a trend that's shifting how we think about care at the end of life. NOEL KING, HOST: More and more people are choosing to die in their homes instead of in hospitals. The New England Journal of Medicine reports the number is the highest it's been since the early 1900s. So families are turning to trained caregivers for support. NPR's Hannah Hagemann has the story. HANNAH HAGEMANN, BYLINE: Not everyone is able to choose where they spend their final days. And until 2016, most people died in hospitals. But now home is the most common place of death. There, people are often surrounded by family, caretakers and nurses. But when it comes to actually facing death and openly discussing it, a lot of us are afraid. GARRICK COLEWELL: Keep in mind, we only die once that we're aware of. And it's not something we do like riding a bicycle or getting in the car and driving to work. HAGEMANN: That's Garrick Colewell. His wife, Kensloe Kelley Colewell, battled with stage four melanoma for years. She died in February 2019. Early on in her diagnosis, she made the decision to work with a death doula. It's what it sounds like, but instead of bringing babies into the world, these doulas help people transition out of it. COLEWELL: It allowed her to experience what she was experiencing fully and with less anxiety and less trepidation and less fear. HAGEMANN: Colewell says working with a death doula opens people up to a more spiritual side of death. COLEWELL: And to be present to it and to honor the sacredness of the passing versus just simply saying, well, you know, here's a little bit of morphine, and I'll see you later. SARAH CROSS: Hospitals are designed to treat acute illness. HAGEMANN: That Sarah Cross, a researcher at Duke University. Cross co-authored the new report on dying. CROSS: It has been a really strong, forceful movement by a lot of the leaders in palliative care and hospice wanting to ensure that patients are not receiving care that could be harmful, could prolong their suffering. HAGEMANN: Cross was a social worker in hospice and palliative care for eight years before entering academia. She says the conversations surrounding end-of-life care have changed. For those needing intensive medical care, hospitals and other facilities are important, but... CROSS: In most cases, it's not the most ideal setting for someone whose needs are largely around comfort focus and emotional and spiritual support. HAGEMANN: For Yvette Benjamin, an end-of-life doula, that support is key. YVETTE BENJAMIN: A birth doula is there to be a coach. That's what I see us being also. HAGEMANN: Except they're coaching people on dying. It's a mix of emotional and practical counselling beyond what nurses or hospice workers would normally provide. Benjamin volunteers her services as a death doula; others charge hourly or daily rates. Not everyone can afford it. EDO BANACH: There was nothing crazy about the idea. In fact, it made complete sense. HAGEMANN: That's Edo Banach, Bannock who leads the National Hospice and Palliative Care Organization. BANACH: I see the doula as filling in all those gray areas that sometimes are difficult for a hospice or a community-based palliative program to fill in. HAGEMANN: He says with more people dying at home, there is a growing need for more types of support. BANACH: We have 10,000 people turning 65 every day. The demographics are such that there aren't enough people to care for the folks who need help right now. HAGEMANN: In reality, these choices often come down to a matter of resources. Researcher Sarah Cross is concerned about that. The report she co-authored finds other factors contribute to where and how people die, like race and socioeconomic status. And as death increasingly moves into the home, doulas are just one part of the end-of-life equation. Hannah Hagemann, NPR News. Read more: https://www.npr.org/2020/01/03/793257344/one-way-to-die-hire-an-end-of-life-doula?ft=nprml&f&fbclid=IwAR32tIbuVWCWO7baLCPKwImWSCSgrEIV7ViEUntXP_X5FL0vtYNjIJB9NbE ...

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Essential Oils and Seniors

Dec 20, 2019

Essential Oils and Seniors

When it comes to the later years in life, there can often be things that may never have bothered us before, but become a real issue. Life as you get older presents new challenges, and many of them can have much to do with energy, both physically and mentally. There can be a shift in mindset and an increase in anxiety. Essential oils have long been something that people have chosen to help them to feel calm, energized, and positive in aspects of their lives. This is why I want to explore the major benefits of how essential oils can benefit seniors greatly. First, here’s a little background. What are essential oils? Essential oils are often used in aromatherapy, and have long been seen as an alternative form of medicine that uses plant extracts to support health and well-being. The oils capture the plants essence and enable it to be used in different ways. Essential oils are most commonly used in aromatherapy, where the oils are inhaled through different methods. They can also be applied directly to the skin at certain pulse points, where they can react in different ways to give the user the desired relief or calm they are wanting. Inhaling the essential oils can stimulate areas in the brain that play vital roles in emotions, behaviors, sense of smell and long-term memory. The part of the brain, the limbic system, can also benefit as it has much to do with physical ailments such as breathing, heart rate and blood pressure. What essential oils are popular? There are many different types of essential oils that are available today, and some of the most popular ones you probably have heard of. Many do similar things, but some essential oils can have stronger benefits in different areas of health. Some of the more popular essential oils include: Peppermint - used to help aid digestion and boost energy levels Lavender - used to relieve stress and promote calmness Rose - used to improve mood and help with anxiety Chamomile - used to promote relaxation and sleep Tea Tree - used to fight infections and boost immunity Lemon - used for many things including headaches, boosting mood, and helping with digestion What can essential oils help seniors? When it comes to seniors using essential oils, there are many ways in which they could help improve their health and well-being. Older people generally can feel more anxious, worried and stressed. Essential oils used in aromatherapy, such as Rose, Lavender and Lemon could help to calm a racing heart rate and anxious thoughts. In terms of health benefits, digestion can often be a troubling health area for seniors, and using essential oils could be a way to help alleviate common ailments such as trapped wind or constipation. In conclusion, whether applied to pulse points directly on your skin or inhaled through various aromatherapy options, essential oils can help physically and mentally with your health and well-being. ...

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Crystals and Seniors

Nov 26, 2019

Crystals and Seniors

As we age, health issues become more prevalent. This includes problems with chronic pain and conditions such as arthritis. Aging individuals are constantly searching for new ways to cope with medical conditions and ailments with some discovering the healing power of crystals. Today, there is more information on crystals than ever before, from the different types to the impact that they could have on our health and wellbeing. There are crystals for the home, children and even pets. You may even see crystals in places of business in the hope that they will improve the wellbeing for all people. People have found that crystals can help with a variety of physical conditions. Others use crystals for emotional or physical benefits, and still others believe that the energy they provide offers benefits to the soul. But could crystals be the right choice for seniors? What Do We Mean Be Seniors? ‘Senior’ is a term commonly associated with the eldetly. However, in this instance a senior could be anyone over the age of forty. It’s at this stage that medical conditions which will cause an impact later in life begin to develop. As such, anyone over the age of forty could find fantastic benefits from using the right crystals to promote positive energy forces. What Crystals Are Available? There is a massive list of crystals available that could help seniors suffering from different conditions. For instance, Blue Calcite and Emeralds are believed to help with the general process of aging that causes emotional and mental symptoms. Alternatively, Alexandrite and Amber may have a positive impact on those suffering from Alzheimer’s disease. Apache Tears and Aqua Aura could also be beneficial for those suffering from depression. This is a common condition in the senior population, particularly for those with hearing difficulties. How Do Healing Crystals Help Seniors? Research is constantly exploring the potentially profound benefits of crystals for seniors. However, holding a crystal, placing one on your body or adding them to your home environment can promote emotional, physical and spiritual healing. Crystals are able to achieve this by interacting with the energy field of your body or Chakra. Many people have reported improvements in physical and mental conditions after introducing certain crystals into their daily life. As such, crystals could be an option worth exploring for both seniors and their caretakers. What To Consider? If you are exploring crystals to help with issues of aging, then there are various factors to consider. You need to think about where you are placing your crystal in the home. Ideally, you should select a spot that is a mindful place. Alternatively, you can carry them or wear them on your body in the form of a bracelet or necklace. In doing so, you can ensure that the crystal is in direct contact with your energy field. Ultimately, crystals are part of the study of nature. They may impact our health and our energy to provide fantastic and extraordinary benefits for senior individuals who incorporate them into their daily lifestyle, including for pain relief. ...

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Terminal diagnosis

Oct 21, 2019

Terminal diagnosis

When facing a terminal diagnosis, everything can seem like it is slipping away, and that is when you need the most support in your life. For this reason, you might want to consider looking into getting a death doula to help you through this difficult time. The Support You Need If you or someone you know has recently received a terminal diagnosis, coming to terms with this and learning how to cope might seem overwhelming and undoable. It is important to remember that you are not alone, and there are people who can help you by providing support and guidance about what you can do to get through this difficult time. Losing someone is never easy, and being told that you are dying is something that none of us expect to go through, so having support can make all the difference. Informative And Helpful Providing you with all of the information that you need is what we are here for. If there is anything that you want to know about end of life or even ways that you can cope with a terminal diagnosis, we are a phone call away to assist with answers, suggestions for comfort, and most importantly support. Ensuring that you not only feel prepared but are prepared is the main goal of end of life care, and keeping you comfortable throughout your final hours, days, months and years on Earth is our priority. We hope that you have found this article helpful, and now know a little more about terminal diagnosis services that are available to you. Get in touch with us today! We have presences all across New Jersey in Colonia, Somerset, Metuchen, Edison, Rahway, East Brunswick, East Hanover, Westfield, Woodbridge, Sayreville, Berkeley Heights, and Cherry Hill. ...

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About You Are Not Alone

About Adrian Allotey, Owner, Certified End-of-Life Doula I am currently living my best life by responding to a calling on my life; service to elders and their loved ones. My life’s calling came as a result of being present in my 106 year old, loving grandmother’s journey until her last breath. Although I loved her dearly, I often felt troubled that I couldn’t be there for her like I wanted. Life got in the way; being a wife and mother and having a successful career. She was pretty healthy, but she lacked companionship. I knew there were things that could improve the quality of her life such as long talks, sharing stories, cooked meals, and transportation to the doctors, stores and church. I did my best, but there simply wasn’t enough time in the day to show up like I felt she deserved. Her passing gave my life’s purpose clear; service to elders and their loved ones. I made it my life’s mission to promote the final years as a sacred, beautiful, honorable stage of life. I became a hospice volunteer and a certified end-of-life doula, a person who assists in the dying process, much like a birth doula does with the birthing process. Working with elderly patients has been life affirming so much so that I left a career of 20+ years. Along with my team, we serve as non-medical elderly companions who specialize in physical, emotional and spiritual care. We meet our clients on their terms, see them as whole, and build relationships with them and their loved ones. Our self-care regimen, personal growth and intuition allow us to mindfully hold space and provide comfort for elderly people and their family in a non-judgmental, loving manner. Our motto “heart to heart" is evident in the holistic elder companionship we provide. Holding this space decreases the stress and fears family members face when looking for care for their loved ones; whether they are in need of respite relief, work long hours or live long distance. We can help. Through extensive end-of-life doula training, we are able to provide support, education, and suggestions for comfort. We have a toolkit of available resources to ease the anxious person and their family members including virtual “elder cams,” essential oils, crystals, reiki, mindfulness practices, etc. We are often referred to as “angels”, “Godsends”, “extraordinary”, “beyond belief” and words of the like. Contact us TODAY to see how we can be of assistance to you TOMORROW and we promise to assist in enhancing the life of your loved elder. MEMBERSHIPS National End-of-Life Doula Alliance Doulagivers National Hospice and Palliative Care Organization End of Life Practitioners Collective National Home Funeral Alliance CERTIFICATIONS Doulagivers End of Life Doula Practitioners Training Reiki Level 2 VOLUNTEER EXPERIENCE Ascend Hospice Reiki Practitioner and End of Life Doula Haven Hospice Reiki Practitioner


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